I Didn't Read My Bible Today!

I didn't read my Bible today, and I don't feel bad about it.

There...I said it!

Does that shock you? There was a time in my life where if I missed reading my Bible, at the end of the day, I would have been filled with self-condemnation. The tapes would begin to roll in my mind, "Look what you've done, Tina. You didn't even have time for God. What's wrong with you? Can't you get it together and make time for it?"

Please don't misunderstand me, friends. I love the truth of God's Word. It sets us free. It is a lamp unto our feet and a light unto our path, of this I am fully aware and totally believe. Yet, what the Lord has been showing me is even more amazing to me personally. In my spirit, I truly feel the Lord releasing me from the "performance mentality" which basically says that in order to be closer to Him or more like Him, that I must "strive" and "press through" or whatever form of Christianese you want to call it. It's simply not true. (Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt.)

I truly feel the Spirit drawing me to continual communion with Him throughout the day, and this learning to constantly abide in Him means far more to me than planning out my 30 minute time slot to "study my Word" and then check it off my list for the day. Because there is that tendency in us, you know, at least in me. It is a certain sense of accomplishment on my part; a certain sense of self-righteousness that muses "Oh, I read my Bible for an hour today. Wow. I am so spiritual."

We must hide God's Word in our hearts, friends. No doubt. But we must resist the temptation to base our spirituality on how much we "study" or read the Bible. Frankly, at this point in time, I am reading books on family, marriage, boundaries and grace, which are filled with His Word through believers in Christ, and I am gathering much divine wisdom and knowledge from those. Yet, even in this, I cannot and should not boast, because it gains me nothing if I have not love! If I have no fellowship with my Lord and no agape flowing through me, then all the studying in the world would be like chaff blown away.

May God's precious Word be a delight to us, not a way to enlighten or elevate ourselves above others or to gain certain acceptance or blessing from our Father. May our motivations always be pure in the light of His love and not merely a way for us to feel better about ourselves or to check it off our spiritual agenda. May we see our time seeking Him through prayer, through viewing nature, through time spent with others, through listening to His voice as all part of our daily walk of grace. May we be set truly free of being driven to perform tasks, no matter how spiritual they may be, out of a sense of guilt, fear or striving. May we come to the study of Truth with a fresh and open heart to hear Him however He chooses to speak to us each day.

Peace, love and grace to all,
Tina